Female Vampire

The Movie

A French "erotic horror" film by Jesus Franco. The plot revolves around Countess Irina von Karstein (played by Lina Romay), a mute woman who needs sex like a vampire needs blood in order to stay alive forever.

The movie's shooting title was La comtesse noire, but it has been released in various forms, under several different titles, including Bare Breasted Countess, Erotikill and Les Avaleuses with running times ranging from about 70 to over 100 minutes. Some versions emphasise the horror, others the erotic, some include hardcore pornography. This version, at about 93 minutes, is soft core pornography, with virtually no blood.

Review

You know a movie is a bomb, when the bare-breasted leading lady starts by approaching a chicken farmer (yes, a chicken farmer), and he says "What Do You Want?". After such a great opening line, it's downhill all the way.

Oh, and as she also looks like she's been sucking lemons all day, it's about as erotic as an empty cigarette packet.

The DVD

Includes extras, such as an alternative title sequence (looks identical to me, including the bit when she hits the camera lens with her nose. Seriously). Plus some blood-splattered versions of some scenes, and a French trailer.